From Russia With Levie – A Work Story

STEPHEN D’ALTON

excelaWRITER@gmail.com

There’s no denying it, I am a massive fan of James Bond. From Ian Fleming’s ‘Spy story to end all spy stories’ through to the present day Bond films. I love them all. So much so, that when our son was born we named him Timothy after actor and fourth Bond Timothy Dalton.

Bond is of course no stranger to Russia. For many years he traded blows with numerous agents of KGB and SMERSH (‘Death to Spies’). In the 1995 film Goldeneye Pierce Brosnan’s James Bond meets the aptly named Georgian assassin Xenia Onatopp. She asks him if he’s ever been to Russia to which Bond replies quite casually “Not recently. I used to drop in occasionally. Shoot in and out.” Xenia in response assures Bond that Russia has changed and is now a land of opportunity.

And so it was for us at Subex, and our efforts to expand our customer base in the East. An opportunity came up to perform a software trial for a state run Telco in Moscow. With projects like these it’s crucial that proper data gathering is done to ensure that your code can handle the conversion of Call Detail Records (CDRs). I was asked to go to Moscow, meet the customer and gather the data needed to set up the trial. It was to be a quick trip, in and out, a bit like those Russian trips of James Bond, sans the shooting of course! But I’m no secret agent though I did once work for Her Majesty’s government during a stint at the Serious Fraud Office (London) in the late nineties. However, the only thing we killed there was time.

On 9 June 2006 I boarded an Aeroflot Boeing at Heathrow, destination Moscow. I had heard some horror stories about Russia’s largest airline so was pleasantly surprised with the overall service provided on my flight. Anyone who has traveled extensively will tell you that international airports the world over are pretty much the same. Indeed this was true of Moscow’s Sheremetyevo Airport. Usually the worst part is passport control. Thankfully my trusty Irish passport allowed me relatively unobstructed passage through customs.

Somewhat surprisingly, given that it was summer, the skies outside looked grey and sad. My taxi took a route past the famous Gorky Park. The imposing main entrance gate structure looked bleak under the heaviness of this morose sky. 

Home for the next few days was a Georgian guest house situated in the centre of the city. It was a lovely old building with a wide spiral staircase and lifts that you would expect to see in a 1930’s hotel. The ‘Out of Order’ sign perhaps a hint to their advanced years? Upon my arrival the receptionist provided me with a stamped document. Apparently the police would stop and fine (read bribe) foreign visitors who didn’t have this document on their person. It happened to one of our sales people on an earlier visit to Moscow.

Upstairs in my room I heard a knock on my door. It was Levie, our man in Moscow. I invited him in and we settled down to run through the plan for the following days meeting. As I covered off my understanding of the agenda Levie became excitable and somewhat agitated. He felt that I was ill-prepared for what he believed we would be discussing with the customer. When he left I felt decidedly concerned about what lay ahead of us.

It was time for supper. The guest house didn’t have its own restaurant but I was told there were a few eateries nearby. As I exited the building an enormous shiny black Hummer with sparkling chrome mags pulled up next door. The Hummer’s questionable passengers, expensively attired in black, alighted the vehicle. I walked on making little eye contact. Along a main thoroughfare nearby I spotted an American styled burger joint. I also noticed on two separate street corners pairs of suspicious and official looking men in leather jackets just watching the night’s activities. The restaurant was quite nice and the suitably attractive Russian waitress spoke some English. Anyway, how hard could it be to pick a burger from a picture menu even if it is in Russian? The food and venue were really good but I doubt Mr. Bond would ever find himself in a place like this. No Vodka or Beluga for starters.

The next day Levie and I went to see the customer. He was about my age, wore an ill-fitting suit and only spoke Russian. Levie translated but told me later that the customer could speak perfect English but chose not to. He then told me that the afore-mentioned gentleman and his boss, resplendent with KGB jacket pin, were both ex-KGB. How did Levie know so much about the KGB? Well, apparently Levie was a Russian Jew who had been exiled to Israel during the Yeltsin years. He was adamant that the KGB still held files on him, which most likely they did. And although he was Russian he always referred to them as if he were not. All in all the meeting went off much better than expected. The customer then took us to lunch in a brewery. The tables had pumps where you could pour beer into very long glasses. And the food was great too.

The following day was spent with the IT guys. I was taken on a tour of their very impressive server room. We had to wear plastic covers over our shoes and hair. Entrance was via a series of air-locked chambers. Inside the vast space, the floors were pristine and the servers cabled to perfection.

Above: Standing in front of Lenin's Mausoleum

My trip had come to an end. Levie joined me for the journey to Sheremetyevo Airport. As we made our way along the Moskova River Levie instructed the driver to take us to Red Square. He wanted me to get a few photos, for the record. The stop at Red Square was certainly worth it. I could just visualise the bushy-eyebrowed former Soviet Leader Leonid Brezhnev inspecting the might of Soviet power as military vehicles moved along the square. We ran around briefly marveling at St. Basil’s Cathedral and the Kremlin while Levie took a few poor quality snaps on his Nokia.

Above: St. Basil's Cathedral

Soon it was time to say goodbye to Levie. This had been quite an eye opener for me. But not to worry ...

STEPHEN D’ALTON WILL RETURN